


Don't Blame Me

by RollyPratt



Category: Life with Derek
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Blood Play, Claiming, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Mildly Dubious Consent, Past Abuse, Vampire Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-14
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-01-30 13:15:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21428827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RollyPratt/pseuds/RollyPratt
Summary: In a heartbeat he would look like the boy she fell in love with all those years ago, but his soft traits and the untameable fire in his eyes are gone. He looks tired, hard and rough. His mouth is stretched in an easy smile, but his gaze is dark, calculating. He’s on the prowl, just like she is.Their eyes meet, and if her heart was still beating, it would break out of her chest. She thinks: It’s fate.(An Angsty Vampire AU.)
Relationships: Casey McDonald/Derek Venturi
Comments: 54
Kudos: 36





	1. Someone I Used To Know

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Krewlak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Krewlak/gifts), [woochew07](https://archiveofourown.org/users/woochew07/gifts).

> I don't know why I'm doing this because I'm currently working on five other things but what the hell. You're getting a multi chapter - short ones, to be fair - because I can't do one shots apparently.
> 
> Adapted from something written with @Krewlak, once upon a time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moodboard made by the lovely [binxxx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Binxxx/profile). <3

_ _

_"Don't blame me, love made me crazy_   
_If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right"_

It’s the same as every other night, a cramped dance floor, loud music and a drunk unsuspecting crowd. She’s picked a girl already, a beautiful blonde girl who smiles brightly from across the room, reminding her of someone she’s long forgotten. They dance, and she presses the blonde’s body against her own, breathing in the sweet scent of nostalgia.

The hunger is gnawing at her, as their bodies move to the rhythm of the music. She lets her mouth wander down the girl’s neck, teeth scraping against her pulse point, until the girl heaves an inviting sigh, and she finally lets her fangs sink into the soft skin. The first pull of blood is life rushing back into her body, and the sweet taste of copper she’s now addicted to.

She licks up the wound, allowing it to close and heal. She doesn’t want to ruin a good night by letting a body fall so early in the evening.

There’s something sweeter in the air still, a smell she’s never been able to resist, of cheap cologne and hockey gear, old spice and a thin coat of sweat. She lets her eyes wander around the crowd, and that’s when she spots him.

He could easily be someone else. He’s leaning back against the bar, a glass in his hand, eyes examining the mass of throbbing bodies around them, and his other hand pushing back wild curly hair.

He isn’t anyone else, though. In a heartbeat he would look like the boy she fell in love with all those years ago, but his soft traits and the untameable fire in his eyes are gone. He looks tired, hard and rough. His mouth is stretched in an easy smile, but his gaze is dark, calculating. He’s on the prowl, just like she is.

Their eyes meet, and if her heart was still beating, it would break out of her chest. She thinks: _ It’s fate_.

Pulling away from the girl she’s made hers just a minute ago, she backs away, holding his gaze until she’s sure he got the message, and disappears into the back of the club. She breathes heavily into the night air, out of the breath she doesn’t need, one of those remnants of humanity she was never able to shake off, and stabilizes herself against the facing wall.

The back door opens and closes in a loud bang behind her. Then there’s only silence, the sound of her breathing and the racket of an erratic heartbeat, which can’t be hers.

"Casey?" his whisper breaks the silence.

Hiding her smile into the shadows, she moves to the side as she glides her hand across the brick wall. "I don’t know who that is," she pushes through a tight throat. 

His scent is all around her, the aroma of his skin and the whiskey on his breath. The smooth sound of his voice resonates around in her head. All of her senses are overwhelmed by him. She feels tears prickle at the corners of her eyes and it feels so foreign now. She hasn’t cried in almost a decade.

His heartbeat slows as he takes deep calming breaths, but he keeps advancing. "Sorry, you uh… look like someone I… someone I used to know."

She feels his touch before his hand is even on her, then he’s gently grabbing her shoulder. Though she’s been imbued with much more strength than a regular human being, she can’t find it within herself to fight. Her eyes shut tight, she lets him turn her around, until her back hits the wall.

She hears his sharp intake of breath and his heart stops for almost a second. Then, his hand is brushing against her cheek, ever so gently, like he’s afraid she will break, or disappear, under his touch. His thumb wipes the wet tears away, and she opens her eyes to see the pad of his finger coming away black with her mascara.

"Case…" he breathes out, eyes wide like he’s seen a ghost. She guesses he has, in a way.

"Der…" she says, unable to stop his name from escaping her lips, or the hand that reaches out to touch his face.

One second, he’s pulling away like she’s burned him, and runs a hand through his hair frantically, leaving them another level of dishevelled. The next, he’s got her face cradled in his hands and his mouth is inches from hers. "What the fuck, Casey?" 

Casey smiles. He’s here, out of thousands of clubs in New York, he met her here. "Long time no see," she says softly, peering into his eyes, those chocolate brown eyes she hasn’t seen in so long, too long.

"_Long time no see_?" Derek repeats incredulously, like she’s said the most outrageous thing he can think of. "Casey, _ what the fuck_?"

He’s shaking her head, and it hits the hard bricks behind her but the pain feels good. His nose is grazing hers and his breath is warm on her face and his smell surrounds her like the smell of a home cooked meal you haven’t had in ages. 

She licks her lips, pushing the pangs of hunger away. "You look good."

He laughs, and it’s more maniacal than usual, like he’s gone insane. He presses his forehead against hers and when he blinks, she catches sight of the tears falling behind his lashes. "Everyone thinks you’re fucking dead, Case."

Oh right. _ That_.

It had seemed like the right thing to do, leaving her family behind ten years ago, given the circumstances, knowing that she would have become a danger to them eventually. Knowing that still, getting Derek back was just too good to pass up. He was _ hers_.

"You can’t tell anyone, okay?" Casey smiles, it could be their little secret. She lets her hands wander over his chest, feeling the heat of his skin underneath his shirt. His jacket fits his shape perfectly, while his jeans hang low on his hips, perfectly in style and thoroughly appetizing.

Derek pulls away. "Have you gone fucking insane?" he practically shouts. His eyes widen in shock, then he’s right back in her face, grabbing both sides as he tries to inspect her eyes. "Are you on drugs?"

Casey giggles at his reaction, like she has need for anything like that. "I’m not on drugs, Derek."

"Then what _ is it_?" he asks, seriously. He looks angry now, and she’s starting to think she shouldn’t have let him see her.

She covers his hands with hers. "It’s just what I had to do, Der," she says in her most soothing voice. She thinks it works because his shoulders relax.

"What you had to do?" he whispers back, shaking his head slightly, frowning in confusion.

"I had to leave," she says, nodding. "To protect you. But now you’re here, we can- we can be together again."

"Protect me from what, Case?" Derek persists, shaking her some more. "What the fuck is this all about?"

"I can’t tell you," Casey says, and shakes her head. "Not now."

"You owe me some fucking explanation."

She frowns at his tone. Owe him? She _owes_ him? She’s a vampire _queen_, she doesn’t owe anybody _ anything._ "No."

"_No_?" he repeats. "You disappear for _ ten years _ and all you have to say is _ no_?"

Letting her hands fall at her sides, she looks straight at him. She can't do this now. He wouldn't understand. "Move, Derek," she demands.

He lets go of her face in order to place his hands on the wall on each side of her shoulders, further encasing her. "Or what?"

Setting her jaw tightly, she uses one hand to push him away, sending him across the alley roughly. He scrambles to stay on his feet until his back hits the opposite wall, looking at her disbelievingly.

She’s about to leave the alley when he asks. "What happened to you, McDonald?" His tone sounds almost sad.

Keeping her back on him, she turns her head to the side so he can hear her clearly over her shoulder.

"Casey McDonald is _dead_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is wondering about the rating. They're _doin' it_ in the next chapter. You're welcome.


	2. You Want To Find Out?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW ADDITIONAL TAGS ADDED. Please check warnings. I don't write anything particularly graphic, but I'm going all Soulless Vampire on this one, so, dark themes to be expected in future chapters.
> 
> Tentatively predicting 10 chapters, might be more.

The next night, and every night after that, she goes to the same club, knowing he'll be there. She feels the pain and the rage radiating off of him, as he stalks her throughout the night.

Most times she ignores him, goes on about her business of flirting and dancing and _ drinking_. She finds herself an attractive snack and disappears at the back of the club.

One time though, he follows her and watches her fuck her latest prey in the crusty dark alleyway, and she hopes it hurts him more.

After that he's more daring, he gets closer, like blinded by something she can't identify. She probably did hurt him, and he wants to make her pay.

She keeps her back to him but she knows he's there before he is, then his hands are at her hips and his chest is against her back, guiding her movements to the music. She likes how warm he is, his skin is boiling hot, wrapped up around her and she sighs, letting her head fall against his shoulder.

He's bolder still, allowing his palms over her exposed stomach, and his body pressed up tightly against hers. She feels his hardness against her backside, and she suppresses a moan. She thinks: _ yes, yes, yes_.

She wants to have him, take him, make him hers, as he should be, or should have been. Suddenly she's plainly aware that she hasn't had dinner yet, and this is exactly why she'd had to let him go before. She knows deep down that she would do it, wouldn't stop until she's devoured him and there's nothing left.

She turns around in his arms, wraps herself around him, her hands tangling in his hair, and licks up his neck until her teeth catch his earlobe. "You should stay away from me," Casey warns.

He’s letting his hands wander up her back, and he answers, whispering into her hair. "What’s the fun in that?"

Her lips curve into a smile, he was always so stubborn. She nuzzles his neck and lets her human teeth scrape against his pulse. He smells so good, and he’s so close, too close. "You wouldn’t like my kind of fun," she says, pushing him away, and turns to leave.

The thought at the back of her mind is_ follow me_, which he does, and she wonders if she accidentally bit him or if they’ve just always been in sync that way.

They’re back in the alley and it’s dark and he’s drunk. The stench of beer is clinging to his skin. He’s all over her, crowding her against that brick wall that’s becoming her second home. Her hands collect what she can of his shirt into her fists. "Did you tell?" Casey asks.

His eyes are halfway closed and his lips are parted slightly, he’s clearly out of it. "I don’t even know if you’re real," Derek says, chuckling sarcastically.

She pulls him forward, allowing her lips to brush against his, but she holds back. "You want to find out?"

In response, he kisses her, it’s harsh and bitter. He’s assaulting her mouth and biting down her tongue like he hasn’t had a meal in ages, and it is _ glorious_. She’s waited ten years to do this again, to kiss him, to _ have _him.

When he pulls away, he’s hissing in pain, his finger coming up to swipe the blood from his bottom lip. She has his taste in her mouth, her tongue sliding over her treacherous fangs to gather everything she can get. With that little taste, her hyper instincts are on edge, and they’re telling her to _ drink_, drink it all. He’s standing right there, and she _ wants _him, so badly it’s killing her.

Before she can make a move, he’s back on her and she catches his bleeding lip and sucks it into her mouth. He’s groaning and pushing harder against her, closing the gap between their bodies, engulfing her in his warmth. That’s her favourite thing about humans, when their limbs are covering hers, it melts her skin. Except she’s not melting now, she’s setting on fire, exploding from the inside, and it’s the best thing she can think of.

He cannot seem to get enough, though his breathing is ragged and he has to pull away for air every so often, like she’s sucked it all out of him. He’s kissing her like he’s trying to make up for a decade of thinking she was dead. She wants to tell him they can keep doing this forever, like she’d always wanted, like she’d dreamed of for years.

The crazy thing is, she doesn’t care about taking a human life anymore, but she couldn’t take his. Wouldn’t, because… she knows he would hate her for it.

She’s reaching for his belt buckle, breaking into his pants to reach for his hard cock desperately. _ He _ could make her his. She wants it, craves it more than she craves blood, wants to feel him inside of her, filling her, and that gaping hole in her guts. 

He responds instantly, hoisting her up to wrap her legs around his waist and she thanks the devil for mini skirts. He pushes her panties aside roughly as she guides him where she wants him most, and he complies readily, thrusting all the way in.

A moan falls from her lips, she’s shuddering around him, as she welcomes him home. He is fucking her. Hard. Tearing her apart or stitching her back together, it’s both and neither, and he’s going mad, shoving back into her zealously. _ Just_. _ Right_. Until she cries and it’s just his name, over and over again. "Derek, Derek, _ Derek_."

He’s coming apart at the seams, growling in her ear, until it bursts and he’s coming undone inside of her. His hips jerk up one last time, burying himself deep, sheathed by her walls clamped around him like a vice, until he’s spent. Then his face is buried in her neck as he falls limp in her arms, panting.

She hugs him, holds him to her, shushing him. "I’ve got you," Casey whispers into his hair. "I have you."

His heart is thrashing around his ribcage, she hears it, feels it against her chest, and he’s trembling, shaking with sobs. There’s a little pool of hot tears forming on her collarbone, dripping slowly down her chest.

He’s not moving, he’s holding onto her, keeping still. She knows why he’s not moving. "I’m here," she says.

When he looks at her again, his eyes are circled with red rims and topped by a deep frown. His fingertips are ghosting over her face, leaving a hot sizzling trail against her skin.

The gentle touch of his fingers stops abruptly, and he’s grabbing her face hard in his hand, looking into her eyes with the most painful look on his face. "Fuck you, Casey," Derek snarls, and it’s angry, and sad, and she notices for the first time that he’s broken inside.

She pulls his hand away from her gingerly, wishing she could feel the sting of his words, but she doesn’t. "Anytime," Casey answers softly.

He chuckles sadly, the way he’s _ never _ done before but the only way he has since he met her again. He shakes his head at the ground. "I was waiting for you," Derek says. "You never came."

She remembers. It was the night she’d decided to confess her feelings. She’d been on her way to meet him at his place, they had a _ date_. She never made it.

"I couldn’t," is all she says.

"Yeah…" he says and takes a step away as he rearranges his pants. "Too bad, huh?"

Then he’s gone, and she lets him go. She brushes the tears from her eyes and allows herself to wallow a little.

She closes her eyes, remembering how excited she’d been that night, how fulfilled and content her heart had been, on the last day it was beating. He’d kissed her for the first time, outside in the quad, and he’d said: _ tonight_.

She was going to tell him that she loved him.

It had seemed then that fate would not have them, because instead of finding love, that night she found death. After waking up to her new state, she had been obsessed. All she could think about was him, and she’d pondered taking him with her for days. She couldn’t, though, because that would have meant disobeying her sire, and back then she wouldn’t have gone against him. He’d threatened to destroy Derek if she didn’t forget about him. So she did.

She’d forgotten about him.

Well, she’d _ tried_. So hard.

But she knew, fate wanted them now. She let him go tonight, but he would always be hers. And she was not letting him get away again.


	3. It's Always No With You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Derek swears a lot. I don't know what to do about his potty mouth.

Somehow he’s there every night, and it’s become their place. Their thing. Every single time he follows her outside. And every single time he’s drunk out of his mind.

He’s killing himself. She sees it plain as night. He spends ridiculous amounts of money at the bar, accepts every single offered drinks, and gives every person looking to take advantage of him the time of day.

It’s almost hard to watch. She’d be sad if she wasn’t already so fucking pissed. She pulls him away from a harem of girls one night and fucks him to make a point. He gets it, she knows he does, but he won’t listen and it makes her madder. She didn’t sacrifice a decade without him for _ this_.

Taking a page from his book, she takes her frustration out on some body she grabs on the way out. That night, she’s feeling particularly ravenous. The brutal dip of her fangs practically tears her kill to shreds. She’s sloppy, hitting an artery and sending blood spraying everywhere. She’s covered in blood in a way she hasn’t in a long time, not since she escaped her sire.

She hears the back door clanging, she knows he’s there, and she tries to will him away so he doesn’t have to _ see. _ But he won’t leave. She _ needs _him to leave, knowing that in this state she might not be able to stop herself. She’s starved and angry, her fangs are out and she knows she’s too far gone now to stop.

He can’t see her yet, in the concealing shadows she’s safe. But when the body is drained, she lets it fall, and he’s getting closer.

"Case," he drawls. He’s clambering around, aimlessly, holding onto the wall. She hates that he’s like this, he’s pathetic, and she wonders if she should just put him out of his misery.

She straightens and glides over to him. He’s leaning, body bent halfway, heaving. He hasn’t seen anything. He has no idea. "This has got to stop, Derek," she says.

He looks up, and falls as soon as he takes her in. He’s falling on his ass on the ground, an absolute look of terror on his face. He crawls backwards on his hands and legs, away from her, from the gory vision in red she knows she is. She’s probably a bloody mess right now, and she wants him to see it. Wants to scare the absolute shit out of him.

"Fucking shit," he yelps as he tries to scurry away, falling over himself.

"And you need to watch your language," she adds haughtily, over-enunciating every syllable. She sees the reflection of her fangs shine in his glassy eyes.

He obviously doesn’t respond to that, just gulps harshly. "What the hell," he says, rolling on all fours. "I’m fucking wasted."

She hates him so much right now. Hates that he looks so weak and pitiful. She grabs onto his collar and pulls him backwards, sending him on his back just a meter or two away. He lands next to the remnants of her meal. "What. Did I just say?" she says menacingly.

She’s never heard him scream before, really scream like he’s scared for his life. It echoes into the alley, he’s screaming and crying, and then he’s vomiting. "What the fuck," he cries between heaves. He’s trying to get up and his hands drag into the pool of blood on the ground. "Fucking shit."

"Derek," she tries to get his attention. He’s just muttering about on the ground like a crazy person. "Derek."

She has to kneel in front of him to force his face to look at her. She knows she’s glaring threateningly. "Derek."

His eyes are darting between the blood dripping at the corners of her mouth and the drips that landed into her hair and he shakes his head. "Is any of this fucking real right now?"

"It’s all real, Der," she says.

He looks down again, his body falling limp as he’s racked with sobs. "Why’d you do that?" he asks, gesturing towards the body without looking at it.

"Because I have to eat," she answers simply.

He’s throwing up again, but there’s nothing coming out, nothing to eject, so he’s just choking on the ground. Part of her would normally take pleasure in seeing such a display, though right now, she just feels like she’s the disappointed mother of a misbehaving puppy.

"What are you?" he asks, when he’s done heaving. His voice is sore and tired.

She has to make a show of sitting him back on his heels. She holds his gaze and picks up his hand, bringing one finger gently to her mouth. It’s leftover blood and tiny chunks of gravel, but she sucks it up, cleans off the rest of his fingers slowly. He’s watching her do it, in a trance. "This is what I am," she whispers.

He’s having a hard time focusing on her, but she sees the wheels turning inside his head. "Since…" he drifts off.

She nods.

"I need to get out of here," he says, trying to stand up. He’s almost successful, getting on his two feet for a few seconds before losing balance. She catches him.

"I’ll get you home," she says.

"No," he tries to shake out of her hold but stumbles again and ends up back where he started. "No."

"De-rek," she scolds him.

"Don’t touch me," he pushes her away and he bounces on the wall. "Whatever the fuck you are."

"Derek, it’s me."

"No, you- you’re not her."

She’s panicking all of a sudden, because she can’t have that. She can’t have him deny her, not now. She pushes him against the wall and he winces in pain. She’s grabbing both sides of his face to make sure he’s looking into her eyes. "I’m Casey, it’s me."

"She’s dead."

"I’m dead but I’m still me," she sniffs, buries her hands in his hair. "I’m me."

He looks away. "Just leave me alone."

"No."

"It’s always no with you," he slumps and since she’s not holding him he lets himself fall, sitting on the ground. "Just leave me here and go away."

She bends and grabs his face again, peering into his eyes softly. "I didn’t want to do this to you."

"You should have stayed fucking gone."

Her dead heart constricts in its cage. That hurts. That hurts a lot. But she steels herself and focuses on his eyes. "Look at me."

He makes eye contact, and she locks his gaze until she knows the thrall is taking. "You don’t mean it. You don’t want me to go away."

Derek blinks, and his shoulders relax.

"You’ll let me take you home, invite me in so I can put you to bed, and you’re going to sleep it off."

She lets him go and observes his face. He’s quiet now, frowning slightly. He sniffs and lets his head fall onto her shoulder. She never wanted to do this to him. She never liked to do it at all. But it was… it was necessary.

He lets her take him home. She’s surprised he’s even able to remember where it is in his state. He says the magic words. _ Come in_. Then she’s in his place, amongst his things. She looks at his white bedspread, then his blood covered hands.

"We should clean you up," she says.

He’s leaning against her sleepily and nuzzles her neck. "Shower is over there," he whispers.

She brings him there and winces against the sharp light after flicking it on. She undresses him and sees the forming bruises across his body, disappointed that she’s the one that created them. She unfastens his belt, and he pushes the straps of her dress down her shoulders. "You coming in?" he whispers, leaning forward to brush his lips against hers.

It’s bittersweet, she knows he wouldn’t be touching her if he wasn’t brainwashed, but it feels so good, because she gets to keep him like this. She lets him undress her and they enter the shower under searing hot water. He keeps her close, kisses her like he can’t help it, dropping kisses all over her neck, her shoulder, her chest. She pours shampoo into his hair, rubs soap into his skin, until he’s clean.

As clean as she can get him, though she knows she’s tainted his soul permanently.

She lets him fall on his bed and he pulls her down with him. She didn’t bother finding clothes, she likes him better like this. He passes out quickly, and she spots the window, can see that the sun is already coming up through the blinds, but they’re safely closed, so she lets herself drift off to sleep.


	4. Just A Few Hours

She has nice dreams for the first time in ten years. There’s sunlight, warm sand by the ocean, and strong arms wrapping around her middle from behind her. She feels warm and safe. Really warm, like she’s setting on fire.

She’s setting on fire.

Bolting awake suddenly, Casey realizes that her arm is catching on fire. She falls to the floor, hiding next to the bed, shielded from the sunlight coming from the window. She shakes her arm to put the flames out, thankful for the hyper healing properties.

"Oh shit - shit," Derek says, and the room goes dark again, indicating that he’s closed the blinds. "Um. Sorry?"

She rolls her eyes and gets back up. "Yeah, I have this sun allergy thing."

He’s standing on the other side of the bed, on the other side of the room, and he looks wary, watching her every move, though he’s also kind of distracted by the fact that she’s naked.

"I’m not going to hurt you," Casey says.

"Yeah…" Derek drawls, "the bruises beg to differ."

She gives him a once over, noting that the purpling bruises from last night are more black and blue today. She forgot how fragile humans were. She tries to look guilty but she kind of forgot how.

"Can you at least put something on?" Derek asks impatiently, waving somewhere behind her. "I’ve got shirts in that drawer over there."

She moves silently, putting on one of his old beaten up shirts, one that she somehow remembers as her favourite in high school. He’s doing the same, putting on some clothing that had been lying around on his floor. He won’t look at her.

"I guess you’ll have to stay," Derek sighs, sounding like the complete opposite of ecstatic.

"Yeah," Casey says, looking down at her feet. "Just a few hours."

He looks at her from the corner of his eye quickly, licking his lips, and shoves a hand nervously into his hair. "Look, honestly I don’t want you here, but…" Derek drifts off, shaking his head of whatever he was about to say. "Just stay away from me."

Then he’s rushing out of the room.

He’s back a second later, leaning in with a serious look on his face. "Just, uh, one question?"

Hiding the hopeful smile trying to break out, she shrugs casually. "Anything."

His mouth opens once or twice before he’s able to force out the words, like they’re just too silly to say out loud. "Vampires, huh?"

"Yeah," Casey says, lips lifting up at one corner.

He nods slowly, processing the information, before disappearing again.

Face falling, she sighs and sits down on the bed. He needs time, she decides, nodding determinedly to herself. She can give him that.

* * *

He brings her clothes back as soon as the sun sets, washed and folded. They smell nice, but they don’t smell like him. 

"Can I keep this shirt?" Casey asks, playing with the hem at the bottom.

"Yeah…" Derek says plainly, avoiding her eyes.

"Thanks."

"I’m not… I’m not gonna be around for a while."

He means he won’t come to her at night. He won’t dance with her and fuck her in alleyways anymore.

"Der-"

"I can’t," he interrupts, and pauses to study her face. Then he’s looking down at the ground, chuckling sadly. "I can’t stand to look at you."

"Derek," she breathes softly. He can’t mean that, can he?

"Not with that face on," he grumbles.

"It’s my face."

"Look Case… or whatever. _ She_’s dead. You look like her, but you’re not her."

She can’t stand this. She has to change his mind. She _ has _ to. When she takes a step forward to reach out for him, he takes a step back. "Look at me," Casey says.

"No," Derek looks away. "You’re not doing your mind trick again."

She freezes, wondering how he can even know or remember what happened. It must show on her face, because he continues.

"I don’t know how you did it, but… I remember last night, and I woke up feeling _ sick _ to my stomach," he continues disgustedly. "I know you did something to me."

Casey shakes her head frantically. "I didn’t do anything_ to _ you," she tries to explain, because she wouldn’t have taken advantage of him, not like this.

"I know," Derek says, stopping her with a hand in front of him. "I know you didn’t…" he drifts off again.

"Derek," she says, trying to get close to him again, but he recoils from her. She has to make him see reason. "I won’t do anything," she tries to reassure. "Please."

He hesitates, his resolve melting fast, and stays still when she takes her next step. She reaches out and places her palm flat over his heart. It’s beating fast, out of rhythm. "Derek, it _ is _ me."

"Casey’s not a killer," Derek spits, finally meeting her eyes in challenge. She can see how torn up he is in there.

This is her last chance, she knows. Her fingers are tensing against his shirt, itching to feel his skin. "This is what I am now," Casey says.

"I can’t accept that," Derek says, shaking his head. "That’s not the Casey I-"

When he stops himself, she’s filling the gap. "I am," she says, bringing her hand up to cup his cheek gently, eyes focused on his. "I’m _your_ Casey."

He keeps shaking his head and it’s all she can do not to groan in frustration. She takes his face between both hands and whispers. "Derek, I love you. I’m yours and you’re mine."

Right away, he brushes her hands off his face. "I’m not _ yours_," Derek grounds out, barely keeping the distaste from his tone.

"You are," Casey insists, frowning. Doesn’t he know, doesn’t he realize? That after all this time they have found each other again for a _ reason_.

"Not anymore," Derek says, almost sadly.

Her eyes dart over his face as she fails at calming her erratic thoughts. He’s morose and dejected, and she’s _ angry _ that he won’t just _ see _ this for what it is: a second chance.

She pushes him back against the wall and he closes his eyes, groaning in pain. "You are."

When he looks back at her, his eyes are dark and mean. "I guess I don’t have a choice, do I?"

She feels tears fall against her cheeks as she blinks. She wants to rip his throat out like he’s tearing her metaphorical heart out. She could just take him, if she wanted to. She could _ make _ him hers, make him believe whatever she wanted. 

But it wouldn’t be the same.

She would know that underneath it all, he hated her.

"You just…" Casey says, panting hard, and lets him go, "you need time."

He nods, obviously not convinced.

"Look, this," she looks around for a pen and paper. "This is my address. See me when you're ready?"

He swallows and takes the paper, disinterested. "Fine."

She moves to the door and turns her head with her hand on the doorknob. "I love you."

"See," he shakes his head sadly. "You got this all wrong. _ She didn't._"

"I did, Derek. I do. I was going to tell you that night, before this happened."

He's silent for a while, and she watches as he observes her face, his sad eyes taking in every one of her traits. She’s not sure if he’s trying to remember her or memorize her, but she doesn’t think he knows either.

After a minute, he gives up, shoulders slumping. "What do you want from me?"

"I just want you," Casey says truthfully. She’s never truly wanted anything else.

Looking down, Derek shrugs his hands in his pockets. "What if I can't give you that?"

"You can," Casey says. What else are they good for if they can’t be together?

"I'm not so sure," Derek says.

"You can," she insists, fingers tightening around the metal knob. 

"Yeah…’’ he sighs and looks up at her with a sorrowful smile. "Thought so…"

"Just come see me. Anytime. You know where I'll be."

* * *

He doesn't come. 

For weeks, she stays alert to his presence but he's never there. She thinks she could go see him, she knows where he lives. But he doesn't want that. He doesn't want her. Not like this.

She's never really hated her condition before. Never felt the need to. It felt good, being free in a way she never allowed herself to be before.

But back then she'd had him.

Now, she has the sweet blonde girl that she's claimed weeks ago. She eventually gives her a name, because she can't just think of her as _ the blonde_.

"Sweetie," she says, leaning into her in the booth and caressing her cheek. "You love me, don't you?"

Sweetie smiles nicely. "I do."

Letting her forehead fall against Sweetie’s, she closes her eyes. "Why doesn't he?" she whispers.

"He doesn't deserve you," Sweetie says, brushing her fingers in Casey’s hair the way she likes.

Casey pulls back, sighing. She knows Derek wants her to be the way she was. She knows he’d take her back without a second thought if she was still alive, still human. She could feel his blood pumping and heart racing whenever he was near her, and it wasn’t all fear. She knows fear. That wasn’t it.

Derek still wants her, and that’s the one thing she’s trying to hold on to, hoping that with time, he’ll come around.

"I wish that was the case," Casey says, tucking Sweetie’s hair behind her ear.

"Do you want a drink?" Sweetie says, turning her head to expose her nice long neck, where Casey’s bite marks still covered her skin.

A flash of reddish-brown hair catches Casey’s attention somewhere across the bar. It's not him, but his scent is just right. "Not now, Sweetie."

Sweetie turns around and watches the guy that stroke her fancy. "Do you want me to get him for you?"

"No, I'll get him."

* * *

He doesn't come back.

She gets back to her apartment alone, barely sated, and cries until sunrise.

There's a knock on the door and it's not him. There's no human scent on the other side of that door and she shudders when she realizes who it is.

She opens the door. "Jared?"

"Hey, baby," her sire says, his large frame taking up the doorway. "You really thought you'd get away from me?"


	5. Getting Emotional, Baby?

"So this is your hunting ground, huh?" Jared looks around, enjoying the view, all the warm bodies swaying to the hectic beat.

Casey hums noncommittally from her end of the booth, knowing he’s not really expecting an answer anyway. Then he turns towards Sweetie between them. "And _ you _ are a darling, aren't you?"

Sweetie’s radiating discomfort, sending a helpless look towards Casey.

"It's okay, Sweetie," Casey says reassuringly. The girl’s shoulders relax slightly.

"You called your pet Sweetie?" Jared chuckles.

"She's _ sweet_," Casey defends. 

"Oh yeah?" he says, looking at Sweetie's neck appreciatively.

"Jared," Casey warns.

His long fingers ghost over the girl’s pulse. "I'm sure I taught you to share, Casey."

"All you taught me was that you take anything you want," Casey snaps.

"That's right," Jared mutters, turning his ice cold gaze towards her. "And right now I want two things: a taste of Sweetie, and a_ nice_ night out with my favourite pet."

Casey grinds her teeth, wishing she hadn't brought him around Sweetie. She doesn't deserve this. Jared always broke her things.

"I'll do what you want," Casey mutters, hoping she’s successfully keeping the anger out of her voice, "if you leave her alone."

"Getting emotional, baby?"

"She's mine."

"And _ you're _mine. Which means I also own what's yours."

"You know what it does to them, Jared. We're not supposed to share."

"Trying to tell me what to do, now?" He growls, suddenly leaning over Sweetie, pressing her into the booth to grab Casey's throat. "I have centuries on you, baby. You wanna tell me what I’m supposed and not supposed to do?"

"She needs to breathe, Jared." Casey warns when she hears Sweetie gasp for air.

His forearm against Sweetie's neck presses harder. "Now listen to me, you'll leave me alone five minutes with Sweetie here and go get us a meal. You be a good girl, and I won't make it worse for you later."

Knowing that his threats are never empty, she nods. He lets her go and she springs to her feet, wants to get away from him. She looks at Sweetie sadly, knowing she won't be sweet again when he's done with her, before losing herself into the crowd, in search for the right one to bring back to Jared.

Derek's scent gets to her then, and she whirls around, looking for him. He can't be here right now. Not tonight of all nights. What kind of terrible timing is this?

She sees him, just in time to watch him being dragged to the washroom by some girl, with her finger hooked into his collar. She needs to get him out of here.

The girl has him pressed up against the wall, her dirty hands roaming over his body. He's barely holding himself up, his hooded eyes unfocused. He's high.

She pushes Dirty Hands away and takes Derek's hand, dragging him outside. The second she lets him go, he collapses against the brick wall and falls on his ass to the ground. "You win, Ca-sey" he sing songs weakly. "You always get what you want."

"You're one to talk," she says, bending down to check his eyes. His pupils are dilated.

"I give up. Can't stay away," he grumbles sadly, looking right through her. She curses his flare for dramatics. This is _ so _not the right time for his antics.

"Derek, listen, you have to go."

"Couldn't stay away."

"De-rek,’’ she berates. "You can't be here. He can't know you're here."

His brow creases in confusion, like he’s hearing her for the first time. "Who?"

"My… he's my… the one who made me."

"The guy that killed you."

"Yeah…"

He finally looks at her and takes her in, his eyes slowing as they drift down her throat. He looks sad.

"You never asked about the fam," is what he settles on, and she’s not sure what she’s supposed to say to that.

"There's no time for this," she shakes her head. "We have to get you away before he comes find me."

"See, Casey would have asked," he continues, clearly set on ignoring her hopeless pleas. There’s one thing he should know she’s never liked, alive or dead, and it’s begging.

"They're not important anymore," she snaps, her hands hitting the brick on the wall behind his head. She hates the way her voice breaks.

"They were to her."

"All that matters is _ us_, Derek." She cups his face harshly, looks him right in the eye, hoping he understands. _ Please understand_. "It's just you and me. And right now you need to get away."

His pupils are so large and blown they look barely human. He looks so small and weak, he doesn’t look anything like Derek either. "What if I don't?"

"He will kill you."

"Maybe that's for the best."

"How can you say that?" she gasps, the tips of her fingers digging into his stubble. He hasn’t shaved in days, maybe weeks. It makes him look so old. "Don't you dare."

She still wants him. No matter how puny, miserable and pathetic he looks, she’ll always want him.

"I was okay," he says cryptically.

"What?" she asks impatiently, getting tired of his non sequiturs. Was he ever able to keep up a conversation or are the drugs affecting him exceptionally this time?

"I was finally okay." His shoulders go limp, like he has no fight left in him. "She was dead... and I was okay."

She frowns, the words burning into her but she can’t figure out why. "Derek. We don't have time-"

"Let me put this in words you can understand," he interrupts, meeting her eyes. "She was _ mine_."

"I am," she says desperately, letting her forehead fall against his. "Can’t you see, I am."

"You… I don't know what you are."

"Derek please," she cries almost silently.

"Could you do it?"

She pulls back again to look at him, she’s still holding onto his face, letting her palms slide up to tangle her fingers in his hair. "Do what?"

"That thing you did… make me forget."

There’s moments when she remembers what it feels like to be human, like when she’s out of breath after running, panting like she still needs to breathe. It’s muscle memory, her organs never forgetting what they were meant to do, no matter how long it’s been since she’s had a use for them. Just like her heart never forgot how to break.

"You want to… forget?"

"Forget there's a monster walking around with her face."

She's crying again, she didn't know she had that much left in her, though unsurprisingly, Derek will always squeeze something until he gets the last drop. She knows they’re running out of time. If she doesn't get back to Jared, he'll find her, and he won't let Derek go unharmed. 

"Okay," she says, letting her hands fall at her sides.

"For real?"

"Look at me."

He looks at her and licks his lips. His eyes drift down to her mouth and he's leaning forward to catch her lips. She kisses him back, fiercely, because she knows it's the last time.

"I love you," she says.

"I believe you," he says, retreating.

"Are you sure you want this?"

"It's that or I'm dead anyway, right?"

She nods blindly, letting go of any argument she has, because… well she hates to admit it when she’s wrong.

"Look at me."

He has the decency to let a tear slip away.

"You never saw me," she instructs, and he blinks once. "You will get home, shower and forget about me."

His eyes linger shut for a moment, frowning like he’s holding onto the memory. She’s done getting her hopes up, though, so she finishes the spell.

"And you'll be okay. You'll be happy." 

She seals it with a kiss, tasting the salty mix of their tears on her lips, and she lets him go, makes sure he gets safely into a cab before pulling herself together to face Jared again, grabbing the first poor soul she finds on her way back in.

He's leaning lazily into the booth, Sweetie lying limp across the seat. She's still alive, though barely.

Casey sits on Jared's other side, trying to hide the sadness on her face.

"You did right to send him away," he says.

She looks up, shocked, even though she knows he could have heard them. His hearing was always better than hers.

"I won't spare him next time," he says calmly.

"I know."

He grabs Sweetie's neck, hugs her to his side. "Come on, baby, let's go home. I can't wait to taste you again."

He says it with a smarmy smile, and she knows he’s itching to punish her.

She knows he won't be gentle.


	6. Because You Are

She thinks about leaving again; she could never stay too long in the same place anyway. But it’s harder this time. New York feels like home - and the thought of leaving Derek behind again is too hard to bear. She knows she’ll have to let go, eventually, because it’s not doing any of them any good.

Jared’s domineering presence only fosters her growing need to escape. He takes her hunting, then he takes her home, and then he sinks his teeth into her. The mere contact of his fingertips makes her skin crawl, when he pulls her close at dawn and doesn’t release her until he’s sated. She doesn’t push him away, he doesn’t like that. It’s worse when she pushes him away.

There’s never a moment Casey is not terrorized by him, and she hates herself for letting him subjugate her again. Breaking away was difficult the first time around. She had to fight against the instinctive pull inside of her that kept her loyal to her sire. The more she stays around him now, the more he tastes her, the deeper that pull sinks into her.

She’s biding her time, waiting for the right moment.

He never leaves her alone.

Sometimes, she gets to slip away from him and finds Derek, stays at a distance, just so she knows he’s okay. He is, he even smiles, _ really smiles_, like he is happy, and it hurts so much that he had to forget her completely to get there. When she returns to Jared, she takes her punishment in silence.

The one thing Jared lets her keep is Sweetie. Casey takes her everywhere, mostly because Sweetie’s a mess whenever she’s left alone. When they get to her apartment, she’s curled in a ball, muttering to herself. “There’s only blood, so much blood.”

It’s the claiming spell, too powerful to be mixed with another, it’s making scrambled eggs out of Sweetie’s brain. When she cries, Casey swipes the tears away gently, and makes silent promises that Jared can’t hear. They will get _ out_.

One night, she can’t stand to see her pet in so much suffering anymore. Jared suggests a mercy kill, but she convinces him to keep Sweetie around. She turns her, makes herself a sister; an ally. They’ll be stronger against Jared together.

The time comes.

Jared doesn’t come back for a few days and she doesn’t question it, she knows it’s their only chance. It’s her _ only _ chance.

Day three without Jared: she’s packing.

The doorbell startles her, and she’s scared for a minute that she missed her window, but as she gets closer to the door, the familiar scent gets stronger. She opens the door with trembling fingers.

A gasp. Stopping heartbeat.

“Casey?” says a voice stricken with anguish. Then she’s wrapped in Derek’s embrace as a scrap of paper falls from his fingers onto the floor. “You’re here... Are you real?”

Her eyes are shut tight as she braces herself against the agonizing pain. “No, no, no, no,” she murmurs between sobs. She couldn’t do this. Not again.

He pulls away and cradles her face in his hands. “I thought you were_ dead_.”

This is a cruel joke.

“How did you find me?” Casey asks evenly, keeping her hands at her sides as her fingers ache to touch him.

Derek’s wide eyes can’t settle on where to look, his hands are all over her, brushing down her arms and tangling into her hair. “This…” he drifts off, picks up the paper from the floor. “I had this address in my wallet. I couldn’t… I couldn’t remember where I got it from. But it’s _ your _handwriting.”

She doesn’t say anything, basks in his warming presence while deciding on how she will turn him away. He won’t back off easily, she knows.

“Casey…” Derek continues desperately, his hands resuming their inspection of her body, making sure that she’s not about to blow up in smoke or something. “What… what happened to you?”

If this sequence of events is bound to repeat itself, she might as well speed things up. “I died,” Casey said, keeping her serious gaze on his.

“You what?” Derek huffs out in disbelief as he closes the distance between them, pressing his forehead against hers. “What are you saying?”

She looks into his eyes, clasps his hand between both of hers and holds it against her chest, where her heartbeat is missing. “I’m dead.”

Frowning, he takes two fingers to her neck, searching in vain for a pulse. She sees the confusion all over his face, decides to enlighten him and pushes his back into the front door with force, advancing on him with her game face on. “Don’t look so surprised,” she says, gives him time to process her fangs and glowing eyes. He’s only mildly scared, and that won’t do. “You shouldn’t have come here,” she growls menacingly.

“What…” he chokes, swallows thickly. “What are you?”

Laughing almost hysterically, because this is just so, _ so funny_, she leans forward, nuzzles into his neck and lets the pointy end of her teeth scrape against his skin. “Think about it…”

“That’s…” She doesn’t know why she lets him push her off his shoulder, but she does, lets him gather her face in his hands and pull her lips apart. His thumb grazes her fang, and she bites lightly as a warning. “Ouch,” he hisses, pulling his thumb back but she grabs his wrist and licks off the blood, closing her eyes so she doesn’t moan at the taste. “That’s not possible.”

He’s not running away. He should be running away.

Letting her eyes snap back to his, Casey pushes him back into the door roughly, seething, hoping to instill terror into him. He groans a little in pain, but the longer she stands still, his heart rate slows.

_ This is not how it happens_, she thinks in a panic. She needs him to get _ out of here_.

“Leave,” she orders, stepping away and blinking to hold back tears.

“Casey, don’t…” Derek pleads, taking a step forward.

“Didn’t you listen?” she wails, “You shouldn’t have come here. Get out.”

“Why?”

_ Why? _ The definition of insanity is expecting a different result, right?

She backs away as he takes another step towards her. “Do you know what I am?” Casey spits back, “Do you know what I could do to you?”

He shrugs.

“I’m still all in one piece,” Derek says and there’s a tug at the corner of his mouth as he watches her cower away from him. “You’re still _ you_. Right?”

She blinks and the tears fall. Could this really be… is she really getting another chance?

Shaking her head, she turns away. “I don’t know.”

“Case…”

“Why are you still here?!” she thunders, rounding on him, unable to understand his lack of reaction. He should be screaming, crying, running… instead he’s… he’s holding her.

“Because you are,” he whispers into her hair.

Her whole frame is shaking with sobs as she clings tightly onto the fabric of his shirt. “Derek… don’t do this…”

“Do what?” he asks, pulling her chin up to look at him. She gets lost in his deep brown eyes, wishes she could feel her heartbeat the way she feels his. His face is getting closer, his breath hot on her face, and his lips pressing delicately against hers.

Maybe she gets another chance.

She wraps herself around him, pulls him close, breathes in his woodsy smell and tastes the depths of his mouth. It’s frantic, it’s intense and desperate. It’s everything she ever wanted.

“Derek…” she whispers.

He shushes her, and kisses her, and kisses her, and kisses her.

She’s not sure how long he kisses her, but it feels like forever. He doesn’t stop, lets her lead him to bed and kisses her as they lie down. She holds him as close as she can without crushing him, lifts her hips up against him as her need grows. She’s hungry, she’s horny, and she's kissing him like he’s all she’ll ever need. She knows she could only live off of him for the rest of times, gets lost in the idea of forever with him as he pushes his hips back against hers.

He peels off her shirt, runs his scorching hands up her ribcage. A small whine escapes from her throat, she’s grasping at him, his hair, his back, tears away the material separating their skin. Their limbs are tangling together, he’s all around her, and inside of her. His breaths are ragged into her ear and he says her name like a prayer. “Casey.”

They’re hopelessly holding on, trying to get closer when there isn’t anymore space to claim. It’s furious and futile attempts at melding their bodies together. He’s not fucking her anymore. He makes love to her, loves her ten years worth. “Derek…” she cries, at the brink of climax. “Derek, are you mine?”

He doesn’t think about it. “Yes,” he says hastily, like he doesn’t have enough time.

“You’re mine,” she claims, keeping her fangs at bay as she bites into his neck. She wants to devour him whole. He groans louder as his thrusts get more hectic and feverish, pushing deeper and deeper until she’s squealing, quivering underneath him. “Der-”

“You’re mine,” he whispers back, and she _ purrs_, vibrating and bursting at the seems.

“Yes,” she confirms, uselessly, before coming apart around him. 

She’s scratching his back and biting his neck and trapping his hips with her legs wound tight, and she thinks for a second that they really are melting into one.


	7. You’re Still Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, I’m updating something! Let’s hope that’s a good omen for 2021. Happy new year, all! 🎉

The sun has set. It’s warm in her bed. Casey is lounging on her side, holding her head up in her hand while she looks at the man sleeping next to her, eyes scouring his handsome face. He looks peaceful, like he’s having a pleasant dream.

Her fingertips skim over his exposed skin and hover above the bite mark on his neck. It’s only human teeth, but she drew a bit of blood, barely keeping herself from tearing into him. She is so hungry, she will need to feed soon.

Derek cracks one eye open, startling her. “You know this watching someone sleep thing is only cute in movies.” He considers this. “Even then.”

“I can’t sleep,” Casey says simply. Her hand brushes down his cheek, he closes his eyes. “Why aren’t you scared?” she whispers. This shoe will drop eventually, just like it did the first time. But for now she has him, she’s wrapped up in his scent, and she can’t be happier.

He looks up at her with a sleepy smile. “You’re probably the least threatening vampire in the whole history of vampires.”

“You didn’t take it so well the first time,” she says, looking down at her sheets, sadly.

“First time?”

She can’t hide this from him, their history, no matter how gruesome, and even if it will drive him away again. Telling him everything takes them much later into the night. He listens intently, he scratches his head and he looks sad again. She can’t hold his gaze.

“It feels like you’re talking about a completely different person,” Derek says eventually, quietly.

It’s not fair to him that he doesn’t remember. It’s not fair, but she will take it anyway.

“Might as well have been,” Casey says, cuddling up against his chest, “you’re still here.”

He holds her tight. 

“Where the fuck else would I be?” he says and pushes two fingers under her chin, makes her look at him. He has such big brown eyes; for the first time since she’s found him again, she sees light in them.

She kisses him, hard and slow. It’s greedy and possessive, and he lets her own him like he truly _ wants _ it.

He lets her push him back into the mattress and mount him, guiding his cock between her legs and clamping down around him when he hits deep inside of her. Head falling back, she rolls her hips in torturous slow motion, reveling in the way he fills her completely, drowning in the sound of his sharp gasps and moans.

She wants this forever.

When she is fully satisfied and her desire is quenched, she falls into his chest, nose in his neck, breathing in deep, licking and lapping up the taste of his salty skin. He chuckles. “Are you hungry or something?”

She drags her gaze back to his, watching him through a cloud of hunger. He shouldn’t be laughing about this, not when her fangs are out and so close to his throat. She licks his lips, nipping gently, carefully. “Why, are you offering?”

His hands are wound tightly into her hair and it’s so heavenly she could take him again right now.

“I’m yours, remember?” Derek whispers raspily, and it’s _ so fucking _ nice to hear. It’s like he’s taking all the broken parts of her and piecing them back together. But she still wouldn’t drink from him, she could never.

“Not like that,” Casey says, cupping his cheek and kissing him lightly. “Just like this.”

He nods, then yawns against her mouth.

Laughing, she pushes herself away. “You can sleep here,” she offers, standing up and gathering an outfit, “I just need to go out for a bit.”

He looks up at her through hooded eyes. “Promise you won’t disappear again?”

She shifts guiltily, eyeing the half packed bag on her dresser, and knows that she couldn’t leave _ this_, now that she has him, she would stay wherever _ he _ is.

“I promise,” she says, pecking his lips before moving out of the room.

* * *

She is not feeling so well, Casey realizes when she passes the door of her apartment. The hunger is making her uneasy and lightheaded. 

By the time she reaches the front of the building, she is folded in half and throwing up blood.

That has never happened before. She can’t make it out of the building, feeling sick and agitated. She feels the urgent need to get back home.

She wobbles back to her apartment, already soothed by the idea of running herself an icy bath. When she opens the door, she finds Derek curled up on the floor just outside the bedroom, groaning in pain.

“Derek!” she gasps, running to him. She gathers him into her lap, looking him over for a wound. Nobody could have gotten in here during the short time she was gone, could they? “What happened?”

His heart rate is slowing down as he holds onto her, his breathing laboured. “When you left…” he says, “it just. It just started hurting everywhere.”

“When I left?” She holds him to her, rubbing her hands up and down his back soothingly and feeling her own anxiety and fever coming down.

“It’s better now,” he says after a few breaths.

She sits him up, eyeing him curiously, and gets to her feet.

“Don’t…” he says, almost anxiously, when she reaches for the doorknob again. “Don’t leave.”

“I’m not leaving,” she reassures as she opens the door, steps out gingerly.

“Casey…” he whines, closing his eyes. She feels it too. The more steps she takes away from him, the more it feels like something’s pulling her guts out.

It can’t be, though…

She didn’t even really _ bite _ him, and claiming spells don’t work like that - unless… unless she made a big dumb mistake.

“Derek,” she says as she walks back inside, her fingers on her pristine neck. “Did you… did you bite me, earlier?”

He rubs his forehead, thinking. “Maybe?”

A two-way claiming spell.

How could she be so stupid?

“Please, Casey,” he says pleadingly. “Just come over here.”

She does, she crosses the room over to him and lets him wrap her in his arms.

  
  


* * *

  
  


They can’t be more than six feet apart without folding over, so she takes him hunting with her. He says it’s okay, but she knows he keeps his eyes away while she’s feeding.

“You’re just gonna leave him here?” Derek asks when she takes his hand, ready to move on. She turns to him, catching him frowning at the lifeless form on the ground. “What happens when they find the body?”

“Nothing,” she says, disregarding his train of thought. “They’ll convince themselves it’s something else. It’s what they always do.”

He nods faintly, and she can tell he is torn. He’s only human, he’s not made for this. But he snaps himself out of it, finally looking up at her and pushing a grin on his face. She’s not sure if it’s a real smile or if he’s forcing it only for her benefit. All she knows is he’s just made his choice.

He tugs her in the opposite direction, walking backward towards the club, with a twinkle in his eye. “It’s a shame I don’t remember dancing with you,” he says.

She feels wrapped up in warmth again - god, how cold she used to feel.

Inside, he pulls her close, brushes his fingers gently down her arm, and whispers sweet nothings against her ear. She can’t help but think about how quickly he adjusted this time, can’t help but wonder if it’s the spell affecting him. The way he clings to her though, feels real, like he’s gotten back something he thought he would never get back, and he won’t let go.

She wants to let him know how much she is his, always has been.

There isn’t enough time left until sunrise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be my friend! Find me on tumblr @realrollypratt, and pinterest @rollypratt (I make moodboards instead of sleeping! I’ve only had pinterest for like three minutes!). Y’all should really join the dasey discord server, it’s a really great place! Come ask for a link on tumblr or on the official dasey discord twitter @officialdaseyd1. 💕


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